firm_detective | Friday night: Ut incepit fidelis sic permanet

::She's not sure what else to do. She wants to hug him, hold him, kiss him, but she knows what's it like, not being used to being touched. Giving him time, letting him set the rules is all she can do at the moment, though she keeps stealing glances at him from the corner of her eyes, like a school girl trying to look at her crush without him, or anyone else, knowing. What can she possibly say? Then, she remembers something.::

Oh, A and I made a cheese cake the other day for you. I saved us each a piece, if you'd like some.

*His half-smile brightens.*

Yes. You made it for me? You must have been more confident than I was.

*He takes a deep breath, thinking of all the months he has been aching for her presence. He takes her hand.*

Misa, I want -- I want you to touch me as much as you want to, and then -- and then, if it is too much, we will stop.

::her smile seems a little sad::
A was, actually. I was kind of a wreck. But, it kept my hopes up.

::She turns to him, curling her fingers around his, her expression softening as she fals against him pulling him into her arms::

Oh, L...I love you so much. I'm so glad you here.
::her voice sounds a bit thick and she can feel the lump threatening in her throat::

((ooc: Time for bed! Good night! :) ))

*He stiffens when she pulls him into her arms, but only for a second; his own arms go around her again, his long, bony hand stroking her hair. In a soft, halting voice, he begins to speak to her as if he is telling her a story.*

The first time I came here, I resented being taken away from my work. I wish that they would not have sent me back in such a way that it became difficult to focus on it, but at the same time -- it is a relief -- something of a relief -- to have ended the Kira case as much as I'll be able to.

I still have work -- there is always more to do, and I have been trying to stay occupied -- but it is not as pressing as it was before. It has mostly been money at stake, rather than lives. I had just finished my case, I had not selected the next yet --

I suppose what I mean is that, at the moment, it doesn't seem to matter much whether I am here or there. I am not as concerned as I was about the possibility that my time here could leave me open to disaster back there.

*This moment of hesitation is longer than the others; he feels like he is stumbling through a verbal minefield.*

It's only -- I had just started to resign myself to not being able to see you. I was beginning to set aside the plans we had made, because as far as I could tell, they weren't realistic possibilities anymore.

I think I had let you go, a little, Misa.

I had lost you, and now it is as if you've come back to life. It's hard to trust it.

Edited 2009-01-22 19:48 (UTC)

::she nods slightly against his shoulder, gently rubbing his back in a slow motion in what she hopes is comforting::

I felt much the same the first night I came here. Even for a little while afterward, I was unsure if I should allow myself to believe...
But, still, I want you to know, that no matter what happens, I will always love you L. I want you to take all the time you need to feel comfortable again.

*He returns her nod.*

Yes, I remember it. I didn't forget anything, Misa. It is only that it felt far away -- you were far away. I wasn't even sure where you were.

I do not know whether it would be better to give it time, or to try to pretend that I never left. When I thought about coming back here -- when I was at home -- what I wanted was for things to be the way they were when I left, or better.

*When I thought about it -- but I tried not to think about it -- spending time that way was futile.*

I want that, too.

::There's a pause as she simply holds him and she begins to think that maybe next time she'll be able to go home with him. Home? Yes...yes, it would be her home then. But, as long as she could be with him, she knew she would feel home.::

Perhaps we should drink our tea, now, before it goes cold.

There is no reason why they shouldn't be,

*he murmurs, then chuckles, nervous.*

I do not -- care -- about the tea. It would be nice, it is always nice, but just now, I do not care about it.

*As he speaks, something subtle changes in his posture, to the point where he seems to be cradling her against him.*

Misa, I don't sleep the way I used to, anymore.

Yes, I don't care too much about it right now, either.

Perhaps you'll be able to get back to that. I haven't been sleeping well lately, either.

I do not know if I will sleep tonight. Maybe I will. It's easy to rest, with you -- I never slept much until we --

*He sighs, again, resting his head against hers.*

It is physiological, Misa. Sometimes I can make myself sleep, but it is better and more comfortable with you.

We will take the tea to bed?

Edited 2009-01-24 20:49 (UTC)

::she nods softly::

Of course.

::Having thrown some tea bags into the water just before they began to hug, she takes them out now and picks up both mugs, handing one to L::

Well, shall we go then?

*He takes the mug of tea, making sure it's sweetened the way he likes it, then hangs back, staring, waiting for her to lead the way. He finds that his shyness has increased. It's like when it all began, he thinks, the first few weeks after she kissed me.*

Yes.

You will wear the red silk nightgown?

Edited 2009-01-27 04:05 (UTC)

::She smiles at the mention of the nightgown he had given her. She looks back at him, smiling::

Yes. It's quite comfortable.

::she leads the way, sensing his shyness. In the bedroom, she turns down the bed, sets down her tea on the endtable and grabs the nightgown::

I'll be right back.

::She heads into the bathroom and dresses, as well as washing her face, taking her time in order to give him some time to adjust.::

*L moves around the bed to what had been his side, sets his tea on the nightstand, and sits down on the edge of the bed.*

*What now? She's the only reason to be here anymore -- there is less to do here than ever -- He props his elbow on his knee, then rests his chin in the palm of his hand for a minute or two. This is what I want? I thought, before I came here, that my life was always changing, but I see that it wasn't true. Although the locations and conditions were different, it was always work.*

*I wanted everything, without compromise -- now it seems that compromise is my only option.*

*There isn't much to be done for it, just now. After a sip from his tea cup, he pushes himself to his feet, takes off his jeans, folds them neatly, and sets them on the small chair between the nightstand and the closet door. When he's finished, he slides between the sheets in his shirt and boxers, laying down, folding his long hands over his chest, waiting for Misa to emerge from the bathroom.*

*He stares at the ceiling, lost in thought.*

::Upon emerging, she softly pads over to her side of the bed and slides in next to L, but not to close, beneath the blanket, taking a quiet deep breath, then exhaling softly::

I haven't been able to sleep in here since you left. It feels nice.

*As soon as she leaves the bathroom, he can't look at anything but her; he watches her make her way around the bed, the lace-trimmed red silk swirling around her thighs.*

*He bites his lower lip, appearing to be mulling something over. As she lays down next to him, he rolls on his side, trying to catch her gaze with his, and murmurs,*

I dreamed of you in that -- more than once.

*He doesn't say anything else about it. He feels that he has already said too much on the subject. It's better to have her here; she's more beautiful than he remembered. Under the blanket, he reaches out a hand, rests it the space where her waist curves into her hip.*

Where did you sleep?

::At his words and the movement of him turning to face her, she turns to face him as well. The hand on her hip is surprising, but welcome.::

Mostly little naps on the couch. Occationally I'd nap in whatever room I happened to be in at the time I felt I couldn't stand any longer. I just...I couldn't sleep here, knowing the bed would be empty.

When you were gone, I stayed in your room, now and then.

*He inclines his head to her, shifting his body so he's closer to her.*

The bed isn't empty anymore, Misa.

I can -- ?

*His face is close to hers. He finds that he cannot lecture her for spending five days in the same way that he spent five months -- sleeping only when exhaustion made it impossible to stay awake. He finds that he wants to kiss her soft, pink lips, watch her eyelashes flutter closed, run his hands over the smooth bend of her shoulders.*

::scootching a bit closer, her eyes are large, slightly in awe as she softly nods::

Of course.

*The kiss is like his other kisses, since his return -- full of need, though there's more finesse in it than there had been earlier. He cups her cheek and jaw with one hand, and the hand trembles a little. Moving his other hand from her waist to her back, he gathers her in against him, whispers against her lips.*

I find that -- it's more difficult to be alone when you have some idea of what you might be missing. It isn't anything so melodramatic as "I can't live without you" -- nothing that sentimental -- but it is -- a matter of preference, mm?

I prefer my life with you in it.

::At the touch of his lip on hers, her eyes flutter closed. When he begins to speak, she opens them again, large and slightly shiny, as if she had just yawned.::

I prefer my life with you in it as well. When you are not there...it may be a life, but it's not a very good one.

*He turns his head, changing the angle from which he regards her, and says, thoughtful,*

No -- it is my life, it is what I'm used to, but -- I think I might have changed. Some element has to be different; it would be most logical if it were me.

*A shrug, and another pressing, affectionate kiss; his warm hand rubs against the small of her back.*

It doesn't matter. I am in the habit of getting what I want, Misa. The trick is to not want many things, and then, in the case of the things you do want, to accept nothing less. You are one of them.

::smiling, she laughs softly, snuggling against him::
That makes me very happy. Thank you. You are very precious to me.

*He rests his head against her shoulder, dark locks falling on her face and pillow, and says in a rueful tone,*

I'm also wide awake; I am not sure what to do with myself. We have returned to the old problem of what I should do with my time.

::The dark hair in her face makes her smile. Gazing through it at the world makes her feel peaceful and his scent calms her::

If it's alright, we could just lie here and relax. Who knows, we might fall asleep after a while. But if not, that's alright, too. I...I feel very relaxed right now.
::gently, she gives him a small squeeze, her arm wrapped around his back::

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