*L shifts position in his pillows and blankets, curling onto his side; he closes his eyes and breathes for a few seconds before speaking. He sounds weary, and unusually apologetic.*
It isn't appropriate, Near -- not quite. Not because of the process that was used, but because of who you are. I had little to do with selecting B, almost nothing to do with his training, and in the end, I only noted his instability. Things were different -- and would have continued to be different -- with the two of you.
What I explained to him was --
*-- he takes a deep breath, and his next words are deliberate --*
I can understand the situation on an intellectual level, but I can't -- feel it. The void, the isolation... for me, there was no one to fill it. There never has been. I kept busy, and the work became everything, and -- everything else became secondary to it. For almost every waking minute, until I came here, I've worked, or thought about working, or looked for new cases to take on.
What you were told back at the House -- it is important that the children are loyal, given that they know more than most, but -- I only wanted you to understand how important the work is to me.
Also... you said something about "consent" a few minutes ago. I was never told you wanted to see me. Did you ask?
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Date: 2008-08-08 08:35 pm (UTC)From:It isn't appropriate, Near -- not quite. Not because of the process that was used, but because of who you are. I had little to do with selecting B, almost nothing to do with his training, and in the end, I only noted his instability. Things were different -- and would have continued to be different -- with the two of you.
What I explained to him was --
*-- he takes a deep breath, and his next words are deliberate --*
I can understand the situation on an intellectual level, but I can't -- feel it. The void, the isolation... for me, there was no one to fill it. There never has been. I kept busy, and the work became everything, and -- everything else became secondary to it. For almost every waking minute, until I came here, I've worked, or thought about working, or looked for new cases to take on.
What you were told back at the House -- it is important that the children are loyal, given that they know more than most, but -- I only wanted you to understand how important the work is to me.
Also... you said something about "consent" a few minutes ago. I was never told you wanted to see me. Did you ask?