The wonder that's keeping the stars apart

[firm_detective]

L sits on the sofa, reading a book, waiting for Misa to return from the kitchen. When he hears the door opening, he doesn't look up.

"Misa, we need to talk about something."

Comments

[misamisal.livejournal.com]

::her hand tightens on his as well and she nods, expression serious::
I know. And...though I know I'll miss my sister and my nephew...::her expression looks wistful for a moment but it quickly goes back to serious and determination:: ...but to go back there, to never see you again...it's just about the worst fate I can imagine. I want to do this, and as long as you'll have me, I'll stay with you forever.
::her expression becomes slightly worryied, her head tilting ever so slightly::
Do...do you want to do this? ::her question is spoken with almost a frightened tone, as if she's afraid he may say no, that he doesn't want her with him, not to this extent::

[firm-detective.livejournal.com]

*His answer is immediate: a humorless, nervous laugh, his blank face breaking into its helpless look again, and a quick nod.*

Yes. Very much.

*He softens, as a knot of tension in his abdomen begins to relax.*

Very much, Misa.

It's only that it involves accepting things I don't believe are real.

[misamisal.livejournal.com]

::her eyebrows furrow now, her expression concerned::
Really? We have to believe it will work for it to actually work?

[firm-detective.livejournal.com]

No, it doesn't seem like it -- we just have to go through the motions in the proper way. But to believe it worked after we've done it... that is what will be difficult.

I think I will go through my life waking up every day to wonder whether or not you're gone. I already do.

[misamisal.livejournal.com]

::she cuddles next to him::
I worry about that, too.

[firm-detective.livejournal.com]

... Even so, as foolish as I know I'll feel during the learning process, I am willing to try it. It sounds ridiculous, but if it is viable -- and it is the only viable possibility to present itself so far -- I think we have to make the attempt.

*He puts his arm around her shoulders, putting his face closer to hers.*

[misamisal.livejournal.com]

::she nods::
I think I'll feel a bit silly, too, depending on what we have to do. I may laugh a lot, I think. ::she smiles slightly::

::when he wraps his arm around her, she slides hers around his lower back, her hand resting on his waist, gently pressing the side of her face to his::
I'm will to try anything if there's a possibility that it may work. Though I must warn you, I'm not very good with getting cut, so I'll probably cry. ::she laughs softly, a bit embaressed:: I may even have to throw up afterward.

[firm-detective.livejournal.com]

*He turns his face and kisses her cheek.*

I don't know how much of a cut will be necessary, or who has to do the cutting. We can learn, though.

I would rather not have to cut you.

[misamisal.livejournal.com]

::turning her face, she captures his lips, then rests her forehead to his::

I'd rather not have to cut you, either. But, if it means we'll be able to be together, I'm willing ot try it.

[firm-detective.livejournal.com]

*He leans into the kiss, then, after she speaks, lets out another uneasy chuckle.*

Let's not make a habit of it.

*He twists his head to kiss her again.*

It seems so real now. It's easy to talk about it, but now that it may happen... there's a different feeling.

Another concern I have is the possibility that I will not be able to change things after all. Then you'll be alone there, completely adrift, and it will all have been for nothing.

[misamisal.livejournal.com]

::she chuckles along with him::
I agree, let's try not too.

::she gulps nervously, then wraps her other arm around him, holding tightly, clinging to him::
I know. I'm scared.

[firm-detective.livejournal.com]

*He embraces her, then picks up a strand of her hair, letting it fall through his fingers to hit her shoulder.*

The incident with Light last week was... alarming. I believe he went into a room that restored his memory of being Kira, and removed his memory of his time here completely. It passed in almost no time, but while it lasted, I have to admit I was panicking.

The first thing I plan to do is to set up some safeguards. I'll never be able to completely ensure my own safety; I can, however, be sure that you won't be left with nothing.

[misamisal.livejournal.com]

::she squeezes him tighter and when she speaks, it sounds as if her voice is being squeezes as well::

It was alarming. And, thank you, but please don't talk like that. The thought of harm being brought upon you...
::she can't even finish her sentence. She can only shake her head and press herself a bit more against him::

[firm-detective.livejournal.com]

... Is something you will have to learn to live with, Misa. It isn't realistic to pretend that it's impossible that anything could ever happen.

*But he squeezes her tightly in return.*

[misamisal.livejournal.com]

I know...I know...I just love you so much, I don't want to lose you, ever.

[firm-detective.livejournal.com]

*He brushes her hair back from her face with the side of his hand.*

I know, but... everything has an ending, Misa. As much as I don't want to lose you, either, the end will come someday. We can only hope that it's later rather than sooner, yes?

[misamisal.livejournal.com]

::framing his face with her hands, she gives a bittersweet smile::
Yes...I hope we can be together for a long time.

[firm-detective.livejournal.com]

*He kisses her again.*

If anything should happen to you... Misa, there won't ever be anyone else for me. I hope you understand that.

[misamisal.livejournal.com]

::she nods::
There won't be anyone else for me, either.

[firm-detective.livejournal.com]

But there should be. You are not like me -- you trust people. Too much, I often think.

[misamisal.livejournal.com]

::she looks away, looking remorseful::
I know. I just feel like, there has to be some good inside just about everyone. If I can connect with that piece of them, then...::she shakes her head, then looks back up at him:: But, I know, I trust people too much sometimes. I try not to, but I feel like the way I trust people, they can't really hurt me with the things I trust them with. It's kind of silly. ::she smiles sheepishly::

[firm-detective.livejournal.com]

You should think of protecting yourself, first. It's one of my greatest concerns for the future.

*He leans back to lie down, pulling her with him.*

I have to be able to trust your discretion.

[misamisal.livejournal.com]

::she's pulled with him, holding onto him tightly, but gently::
Back in your world, I'll be much more careful. Here, I feel as if we can't really be harmed, considering where we are, though I do keep some things to myself.
However, back in my world, I was rather shy, and quiet. Not even my sister really knew much about me. Besides, it'll be different back in your world. No one will really know I exist, except for those closest to us. And I'll make sure I don't put you or myself in danger.

[firm-detective.livejournal.com]

*His embrace tightens, becomes firm, but he doesn't look into her face.*

I said something when I was small that I -- didn't intend to say. Misa, I'm not sure I could ever marry you.

Please understand -- I've said "could," not "would."

[misamisal.livejournal.com]

::she giggles::
That was so cute.
::she strokes his face, smiling::
I understand, and it's alright. We care for each other, and that's all that matters. :)